Cover photo: Sander Sammy on Unsplash
In this article, I will delve into a common issue that perhaps we haven’t noticed yet, or we suppose only happens to us.
Whenever we reach a goal and succeed, it should be a moment of glory and celebration. But unfortunately, most times, this is not the case.
We sometimes perceive our accomplishments as a matter of luck, coincidence, or just being in the right place at the right time. We can’t admit that our progress results from our talent, intellect, or own capabilities.
Even when we are praised for an achievement, we feel embarrassed and believe we don’t deserve the credit.
‘People like us’ can have a good life, yes, but not win big because we know ourselves, our thoughts, flaws, weaknesses, and see inside our hearts. We are incapable of getting closer to those in the upper echelons.
We can’t simply picture ourselves in the same way we do with the successful and powerful.
This is the infamous Imposter Syndrome.
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What is Imposter Syndrome?
The sensation of phoniness. A psychological phenomenon in which people cannot internalise their accomplishments and burden themselves with a persistent fear of being exposed as “frauds.”
According to the International Journal of Behavioural Science, roughly 70% of people from all walks of life have experienced Imposter Syndrome at least once in their lifetime.
The term was first coined by Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes in 1978, while working on a paper called “Imposter Phenomenon in High-Achieving Women.”
Back then, it was believed this ‘syndrome’ only affected professional women. But we learnt it affects everybody’s productivity and health regardless of gender, race, socio-economic status, or religion.
My Personal Experience with Imposter Syndrome
I felt it in my flesh when I was the lead guitarist in a metal band.
I believed people were criticising me all the time, that one day everybody would eventually realise I didn’t know how to play the guitar. So I started pressing harder and harder, and the tension was unbearable.
A string breaks if you pull too hard.
To wipe out the torment, I resorted to alcohol as a coping mechanism. Others fell into depression, anxiety, or drugs.
In my mind, the glorious guitar players in big metal bands were real, and I, simply a pretender; not like them. I was sure I was a complete fraud, a fake.
Celebrities with Imposter Syndrome
It’s not only us, mere mortals, suffering from the battering ram of Imposter Syndrome. Famous people, such as Tom Hanks, Maya Angelou, David Bowie, Tina Fey, Natalie Portman, and Emma Watson, have spoken about their insecurity and that they don’t deserve their success.
Emma Watson once said: “Now when I receive recognition for my acting, I feel incredibly uncomfortable. I tend to turn in on myself. I feel like an imposter.”
What Are the Causes of Imposter Syndrome?
One cause is how we paint ourselves and others in our minds.
We don’t accept that a great actor, writer, TV presenter, or businessman goes through the same issues as the ‘ordinary’ humans.
And perhaps it has its roots in our own childhood since as children, we perceived our parents as different from us.
For a five year old, it is incomprehensible that her mother was once her age. She can’t explain to herself why if she wants to be outside or play video games, her mum prefers to be sitting at a table drinking coffee or talking with other adults.
6 Signs We Might Have Imposter Syndrome
1- We don’t deserve success
We are convinced our achievements are the result of luck rather than hard work. At the same time, we don’t trust those who congratulate us, since we’re not capable of acknowledging our skills.
2- Being exposed as a fake
We get paralysed just by imagining our peers realising we are fake. So we multiply our efforts tenfold to compensate for our lack of talent. This could be linked to low self-esteem.
3- Fear of failure
Anxiety strikes when we are surrounded by the sempiternal fear. We rerun in our minds every mistake we make, over and over again, resulting in an uncontrollable terror.
4- Comparing ourselves to others
We often compare ourselves to more successful individuals. There’s a sense of regret over not achieving similar results. But this is a colossal error because these people are more experienced.
5- We are perfectionists or procrastinators
Having Imposter Syndrome makes us postpone our activities, normally until the last minute. Aside from that, we put more effort into an assignment than necessary to produce the perfect outcome.
6- Being the best
When we are with people on our level and we are accustomed to being the first, we might feel overwhelmed, anxious, and disappointed by our own abilities.
How to Overcome Imposter Syndrome
Foremost, we must understand that if we suffer from Imposter Syndrome is because we are successful; if not, we wouldn’t be suffering from it.
We assume that those who have achieved great accomplishments don’t experience the same difficulties that we do. It could not be farther from the truth.
Everyone has their own shortcomings, and high profile people are no exception. The famous, the rich, and the successful are just like us.
In the 16th century, Montaigne wrote, “Kings and philosophers shit, and so do ladies.”
We are not so different, and can have the same troubles, necessities, and, of course, capabilities. Self doubt, lust, fear, shame, regret, and anxiety also touch the kings, the philosophers, and the ladies.
As an exercise, let’s write all the goals we’ve accomplished, followed by all the factors leading to achieve them. Then, we must analyse if each step we took was, in fact, a matter of luck or the effect of our own effort.
By putting our steps on paper, we prove ourselves that every path taken was the result of our knowledge, decisions, experience, and skills, not good fortune. Now we can internalise and accept we are successful.
I’ve got a friend, a loyal one, who has been supporting me in moments of distress for quite a while now: my Alter Ego.
Creating an alter character has helped me overcome my fears, doubts, and Imposter Syndrome. I wrote an article about it.
People Who Succeed in Life Are Talkers
“Talkers have always ruled. They will continue to rule. The smart thing is to join them.”
In an interesting video on YouTube, Lou Solomon, an expert in Imposter Syndrome, made reference to Bruce Barton, an American author and advertising executive, who said:
I agree. Those we laud, for whatever reason, are talkers. When they speak, they get straight into the hearts of those listening, and for sure, they’ve dealt with the same insecurities we’ve all faced. They’ve been afraid and sown doubts about their own capabilities. But still and all, they moved on, and now they are at the top of their careers, no matter what.
This is the point we all must reach.
We don’t need to be experts on everything we do, just convince ourselves that how we do things is our unique style. It belongs to us, as does our success.
We owe nothing to luck.
One day, when we hug greatness, the peak of Everest, we will not be imposters, but people who worked smartly and never let fear block the way. Our shortcomings do not define us.
